


Obscure

by Anobii1992



Series: Obtuse [2]
Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Angst, Case Fic, Friendship, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, ThirteenInAMood, blind, police work
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-01
Updated: 2020-11-11
Packaged: 2021-03-09 00:01:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 12,915
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27335332
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anobii1992/pseuds/Anobii1992
Summary: The long awaited sequel to Obtuse! I would highly recommend that you read it before you read this.With the TARDIS refusing to leave Sheffield, the Doctor is stuck on earth for now whether she likes it or not while in work, Yaz is dealing with her very first big case, but what does the Doctor know about it?I don't think it will get graphic, may add more tags as I go on.
Series: Obtuse [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1995910
Comments: 31
Kudos: 33





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> The sequel to Obtuse which I would highly recommend that you read first or this might not make much sense. I did write it a while ago though so I have included a short summary here to remind you.
> 
> Set mid-season twelve. While visiting the planet of Troome, the sight that the Doctor borrowed from her future when she was her twelfth self caught up with her and she found herself blind and stranded. The Doctor and her fam were forced to hike across the planet. Yaz and the Doctor shared one tent while the boys shared the other. Yaz found herself opening up to the newly blind Doctor including telling her about some painful memories of her her best friend Nolee from school who was blind, though had a pioneering operation to restore her sight and confessing that she is gay but no one else knows this yet. The Doctor repaid this trust by lashing out at Yaz and using the information against her. Her behaviour and temper became increasingly volatile towards all of the fam and they eventually figured out that she was self-medicating with ginger which affects Time Lords in a similar way that alcohol effects humans. They dealt with this as best they could and eventually were reunited with the TARDIS and made it back to earth where the Doctor attempted to figure out if her blindness was temporary or permanent.
> 
> I really haven’t explained it very well… if you haven’t read it I would go and read it but I’m not your mum so do as you will. Hope you enjoy!

Three weeks after getting back to Sheffield after their time on Troome, Yaz was finishing an afternoon shift. It had been long, and she was tired as she finished off the last of her paperwork, filing reports on a couple of domestics and a shoplifter.

She was supposed to be going to see the Doctor after her shift but she didn’t particularly want to. Ever since Yaz had helped her run the diagnostic scan on her eyes which had showed inconclusive results, spending time with the Doctor had been like spending time with a caged animal.

They were all trying to be patient with her, but everyone had their limits. She had stopped insulting them and in that respect, she was behaving better but she was angry and afraid and refused to accept help from any of them. Even the TARDIS was losing patience; some days she would be accommodating and move whatever the Doctor was looking for into her path, other times she would refuse to move anything and shout at the Doctor in her own way. If you listened to the Doctor’s version of events, the TARDIS was deliberately hiding things from her though Yaz was pretty sure that the TARDIS hadn't quite stooped to that level. Not to say that if the Doctor didn’t stop abusing her, that she wouldn’t start.

With her shift over, Yaz slowly changed into a pair of jeans and chatted to her co-workers in the locker room for a bit. But finally, she could procrastinate no longer, and she lifted out her bag and the parcel for the Doctor and reluctantly started walking towards home.

The parcel contained a white cane. And not the first that Yaz had bought. Although the Doctor had agreed to it in theory and even allowed Yaz to follow the instructions she found on the internet and measure her for it, when it had arrived she had thrown it across the room so hard it had completely shattered. Yaz had been furious with her and stalked off, not returning for two days when the Doctor finally sent her a poorly spelled text from her flip phone, apologising.

The TARDIS was good at looking after her pilot, she had been doing it for a long time. Despite what the Doctor said, she didn’t move things around just to annoy her and if the Doctor had been in the headspace to listen to her ship, she might have realised that the TARDIS was just trying to help. Indeed, when the Doctor had refused to listen to her and fallen down two flights of stairs knocking herself unconscious a week ago the TARDIS had sent a very panicked message to Yaz who had once again arrived to pick up the pieces.

Yaz walked slowly, not particularly eager to spend her evening in the company of the Doctor and her bad temper. But it was a short walk and there was only so long she could procrastinate and so, she did eventually find herself outside those blue doors just outside the Park Hill flats. Bracing herself, Yaz knocked on the door of the TARDIS which swung open and let her in.

“Hello?” Yaz called out, surprised to see that the console room appeared to be empty which was unusual. Initially, the Doctor had been too frightened – not that she would have admitted that - to explore her ship beyond the console room but she had picked up some confidence in the last week or so and had started exploring… though the TARDIS kept looping her corridors back to the console room to prevent the Doctor from getting lost.

Yaz waited by the doors for a few minutes but the Doctor didn’t appear, and she walked towards the console.

“Where is she?” she asked, stroking the console a little. She noticed that one of the floor panels had been lifted up and there was a puddle of oil on the floor. “Don’t tell me she tried to do maintenance when she can't see.” She muttered.

The TARDIS hummed unhappily under her touch and the door that led to her infinite corridors lit up.

“Okay I’m going” Yaz smiled, following the lights. The corridor was long, longer than Yaz was expecting and she was surprised, the Doctor really hadn’t been going far yet. Finally, after walking for what felt like miles a plain wooden door appeared at the end of the corridor and Yaz opened it. It was a… cleaning cupboard. And the Doctor was sitting in it, covered in the same oil that had been in the console room and a look of extreme annoyance on her face.

“What the hell happened to you?” Yaz asked, trying not to let her amusement show lest she incur the Doctor’s wrath. It was too early in the evening for that.

The Doctor jumped, turning to Yaz’s voice in surprise.

“Don’t sneak up on me.” she scowled.

“How did you not hear me coming? I was calling for you. What are you doing in here anyway?”

“Was doing some maintenance and the TARDIS took offence. Locked me in here.” The Doctor complained. She tried to get to her feet but crashed into a shelf and ended up back on the floor. Yaz winced… that had looked painful. The Doctor took a breath and tried again, successfully rising to her feet on the second attempt but then faltered when she realised that she didn’t know where the door was.

Yaz stepped forward and lightly brushed the back of her hand against the Doctor’s, indicating to the Doctor that she was willing to act as her sighted guide. She didn’t miss the relief that briefly settled over the Doctor’s features as soon as she had the reassurance of Yaz’s presence literally in her grasp.

“Come on, you need to shower, you’re covered in oil and dust.” Yaz told her, guiding her out of the room and down the corridor which somehow wasn’t the same one she had walked through earlier but was the one that presumably led to the Doctor’s private quarters, a space where Yaz had never been, not even when they had got back from Troome.

“Is this your room?” Yaz asked, stepping into the space. It was a large room, but exceptionally cosy with a fire crackling cheerfully in the grate, a huge four poster bed that Yaz doubted the Doctor slept in very often – she preferred using the console as a pillow – and the wooden panelling that surrounded the walls was gleaming while the enormous floor to ceiling windows showed a night sky that Yaz wasn’t familiar with.

“How am I supposed to know? I can't see it.” She complained grumpily.

“So, tell me what you think is here.”

The Doctor took a tentative step forwards and closed her eyes. Yaz would never say it to her but she almost preferred it when the Doctor did that now, her once stunning, hazel green eyes which had been so bright and portrayed so much more than her words had ever said, were now covered in a shroud. They were completely clouded over leaving the whites grey and the coloured pupil dull and almost entirely obscured, and while they still moved, and indeed met Yaz’s gaze with impressive accuracy, they said nothing anymore and Yaz didn’t like it one bit. It was like having her lights turned out or something.

“Bed” the Doctor said, pointing to her right and Yaz jumped a little. “sofa… archway leading to a work space and… bathroom” she spun slightly on the spot as she pointed out the major landmarks of the room starting on her right and working round.

“Exactly.” Yaz told her. “I didn’t even know you had a bedroom.”

The Doctor snorted. “Of course I do. This is my home.”

“Do you use it?”

“Uhh… no… fair point that Yaz.”

Yaz showed her to the impressive bathroom so she could get washed. “Do you remember where everything is?”

The Doctor rattled off the locations of the toilet, sink, shower, bath and cabinet.

“While that’s a good start Doctor, do you remember what shelf of the cabinet your towels are kept on? Do you know which bottle in the shower is shampoo and which is shower gel?” Yaz asked her, knowing that when she stepped outside and the Doctor realised she didn’t know the answer that she would get upset which would manifest as anger. As it was, she scowled grumpily and crossed her arms.

“Come here, I’ll show you.”

Yaz took her hand and guided it across the shelves. “Up top you have small towels, next shelf down are bigger towels, down from that you have shampoo and shower gel, then there’s an empty shelf and at the bottom is… a first aid kit.”

The Doctor nodded without passing comment but stored the information in her head.

“I’ve put your shampoo on the right and shower-gel on the left of the shelf in the shower… and while we’re on the subject, why is your shampoo ‘silver-enhancing shampoo for men’ when you are neither a man nor grey?”

“Never got round to changing it.” She shrugged. “I told you, I was a white haired Scots man before I got this body.”

“We really need to take you shopping. Between this and the boxers and the lack of bra…” Yaz muttered.

“What… how do you?” the Doctor spluttered.

“When we pulled you out of the river on Troome and you were unconscious and we had to strip you, remember? You were freezing.”

The Doctor blushed. “What difference does it make? Shampoo is shampoo. Underwear is underwear.”

“First off, shampoo is not shampoo!” Yaz said sounding scandalised. “Second off, women’s pants are way more comfortable than men’s boxers, especially because you wear women’s trousers and you would be a lot more comfortable if you wore a bra.”

“Uh-huh” the Doctor said, sounding uninterested. “Do you mind?” she asked, gesturing to the shower.

“I’m going… but I’m still taking you shopping.”

Yaz wandered back into the bedroom, not entirely sure what she was supposed to do. If she left, there was a distinct possibility that the Doctor might not make it back to the console room for quite some considerable time depending on whether or not the TARDIS was feeling helpful. She made the decision to wait, she didn’t have all night for the Doctor to wander the halls and she wanted to give her the cane that was still in her bag. She opened the wardrobe, intending to pull out one of her favourite rainbow t-shirts and too short trousers but she didn’t recognise a single thing in there… a long brown coat, cricket whites, pin striped suit, smart three piece black suit, a stupidly long scarf, a tweed ensemble, tails, a kilt, a ruffled velvet monstrosity, a leather jacket, a brightly coloured jumper, a cream coat which for some bizarre reason had celery on the lapel and a coat that Yaz could only assume belonged to a clown. Yaz counted twelve outfits, all belonging to men of various heights and weights and presumably personalities, she knew about the white-haired Scots man but did this mean she had been twelve men? Yaz quietly closed the wardrobe, not wanting to be caught snooping and feeling like she had intruded on something intensely private.

Yaz heard the water shut off and the Doctor appeared a moment later, hair wet and tousled and clad in a large white towel.

“Yaz?” she asked uncertainly, and Yaz could see her trying to figure out if she was still in the room and if so, where.

“Still here, on the sofa.” Yaz told her.

The Doctor crossed the room hesitantly, trailing her hand against the wall for guidance, aiming, Yaz assumed, for a dresser placed under a mirror but just meeting the bare wall instead.

“Another two feet to the right.” Yaz prompted quietly and the Doctor closed the gap. Opening drawers she pulled out a white undershirt, wine coloured rainbow top, cropped trousers, yellow braces, stripey socks and yet more men’s boxers. She lined herself up with the dresser and nervously set out across the room again, this time aiming for the bed. Yaz winced when the Doctor missed and stubbed her toe on the bed post, a look of pain and anger crossing her face.

“That wouldn’t keep happening if you would learn to use a cane.” Yaz pointed out calmly.

The Doctor ignored her, threw her clothes angrily on the bed and kept her thigh in contact with the bed as she limped round to the side where she could sit and dress.

“I’ll go and find your boots.” Yaz told her, getting up and crossing the room to give the Doctor privacy while she dressed. She rolled her eyes at the mess in the bathroom – the shampoo and shower gel bottles on the floor of the shower, several towels strewn across the floor, her toothbrush she had left on the side of the sink instead of putting it away, her dirty clothes she had dropped where she had stood and her boots were somehow at opposite sides of the room. Yaz resisted the urge go back into the room and point out that she was only making life more difficult for herself when she didn’t put things back where they belonged. It was a miracle she had made it out of the room without falling over something and if she were to want to find her own boots, she would be forced to crawl across the floor to do so. Yaz took the time to tidy up, right now she was making the decision to pick the battle of her using a cane over her messy habits.

“Boots at your one o’clock.” Yaz announced, putting them down. “And… your top is back to front, rainbows are on the back.”

The Doctor let out a huff but dropped her braces down to her waist and fixed it before she stood up.

“Come on.” Yaz nudged her. “You can make me a cup of tea.”

The Doctor grumbled but accepted Yaz’s arm to guide her from the bedroom.

In the kitchen, the Doctor froze. Yaz put her hand on the edge of the counter to orient her.

“I don’t…”

“You _do_. This is your kitchen Doctor. Nothing has moved around. Trust yourself. Start with the kettle, where is it?”

Keeping her hand on the counter the Doctor cautiously walked around the room to where she thought the kettle was and reached out for it, feeling ridiculous. Yaz was no help, the Doctor had heard the scrape of a chair across the floor and then nothing else from her. She found the kettle more easily than she thought she would and, feeling slightly emboldened, she filled it with water while only getting a little over her cuffs.

The Doctor opened the cupboard where the tea bags were kept and frowned when she realised that she had no idea which box contained tea bags.

“Yaz?” she grunted through gritted teeth.

“I wanted to label things in here for you, but you wouldn’t let me.” Yaz pointed out. “You can figure it out.”

“It’s just a cup of tea, it’s not that important.” She shoved the mugs she had gotten out of the cupboard away from her and slammed the cupboard door shut.

“It is if you can't make one. You love tea. If you don’t know which box has teabags in it lift out the boxes and use your other senses – smell it or stick your fingers in. I'm assuming this means you haven’t been eating or drinking since we got back?”

“There was food in my pack.” She muttered but she did open the cupboard again and lifted a box out at random. She wrinkled her nose as she smelled one of Yaz’s herbal teas. “Do you want this stuff?”

“No, regular tea is fine thanks.”

The Doctor went back to exploring the cupboard and on her fourth attempt she managed to find the box of tea bags which she dropped into the cups.

“Put the lip of the kettle on the mug and then move your hand away so you don’t get scalded. You’ll be able to hear when the mugs are full.”

Yaz was impressed as the Doctor managed to fill both mugs and add appropriate milk and sugar without making an enormous mess or losing her temper and she carried them to the table. Admittedly she misjudged the distance a bit and walked into it but she just let out a breath and put the two mugs on the table before finding a chair and sitting in it.

“How do you know all this stuff?”

“I told you, my best friend Nolee was blind.”

“Doesn’t explain how you know it.”

“I was eleven and insensitive, I used to make Nolee explain to me how she did all kinds of stuff. And her sight was getting progressively worse, so I was with her while she had to learn new stuff a lot of the time. We were joined at the hip when we were young teenagers.”

Yaz drank her tea in silence, observing the Doctor. She was holding the mug of tea with both hands and when she put it on the table after each sip she refused to let go of the mug as though she was worried she might lose it.

“Can you quit staring at me Yaz.”

“Sorry.”

“Will you just say whatever it is you want to say. You’re really annoying when you hover.” The Doctor snapped.

Yaz rummaged in her bag and lifted out the cane, sliding it across the table until it nudged against the Doctor’s hand. The Doctor reached out to see what it was and instantly withdrew her hand with a scowl on her face when she realised.

“ _Don’t_ throw it.” Yaz warned her.

“I don’t need it.”

“Yes, you do.”

“I'm fine.”

“You’re blind Doctor.” Yaz said bluntly. “And you have no idea if you will get your sight back in an hour, a year or ever. You have to learn how to look after yourself and function.”

“I'm fine” she repeated stubbornly.

“Sure you are. That’s why I found you locked in a cupboard for your own safety.”

“I wasn’t doing any harm. The TARDIS was being a big baby.”

The TARDIS chimed in, clearly disagreeing with that.

“Doctor, you have to accept this and start learning to look after yourself.”

“I can look after myself just fine. Been doing it for the last two thousand years.”

“Oh yeah? Then why aren’t you eating a custard cream. Literally never seen you have tea without at least six of them.”

“Trying to kick the habit.”

“Don’t lie to me. You don’t know where they are.”

“They’re in the cupboard.”

“Prove it to me. Go and get them.”

The Doctor was getting seriously annoyed, Yaz could see that, but she pushed anyway. The Doctor shoved her chair away from the table and strode over to the cupboard where she started rummaging fruitlessly. Yaz left her to it for a minute, watching as her movements showed her increasing irritation.

Yaz got up and grabbed her hand, putting it on the packet of custard creams that had carelessly been tossed beside the cupboard.

The Doctor stiffened and snatched her hand away from Yaz, backing up until she made contact with the counter where she folded her arms across her chest.

“I know you’re scared Doctor. Please, let me help you.” Yaz said softly. “I can't keep fighting with you. I don’t _want_ to keep fighting with you.”

“Just leave me alone Yaz.”

“I can't.”

“I can ask the TARDIS to throw you out if that would be better.”

When had they started shouting at each other?

The TARDIS chimed in unhappily.

“Then do it! Make yourself even more alone! And then what? The TARDIS won’t take off. So what, you’ll just bumble around in here, crashing into walls and getting locked out of the console room indefinitely?”

The Doctor apparently decided against commenting as she attempted to storm out of the kitchen… unfortunately the effect was spoiled when her shoulder crashed painfully into the door jamb.

Yaz groaned and picked up the cane that the Doctor had left on the table before following her into the hallway. She was shuffling nervously down the hall, one hand on the wall to guide her and Yaz’s guts twisted painfully at the sight. She looked so small and afraid that Yaz was having to fight the urge to run after and hug her.

Yaz followed her for a moment. The Doctor didn’t acknowledge her presence though Yaz knew she knew she was there. Even without her sensitive hearing, Yaz was making no effort to be quiet.

“I think the TARDIS is still mad at you, there are no doorways in this hallway and we appear to be walking in an endless loop.” Yaz said after she had been following the Doctor for several minutes.

The Doctor stopped and turned so her back was against the wall. She slid down it so her knees were tucked under her chin. Yaz sat down beside her. She looked so small and alone.

“She is.” The Doctor confirmed quietly. “She’s even better at telling me off than you are.”

“How’s your shoulder?”

“Don’t say it.”

“Say what?”

“That it wouldn’t have happened if I had used … it.”

“It’s not jut for you, you know. It warns the rest of the world that they have to move out of your way because you won’t move out of theirs. If we’re walking down a busy street together and you’re just holding my arm, people don’t know you can't see. They’re so wrapped up in their own lives that they walk into you because they expected you to be the one to move. Maybe we get separated. With a cane, people, in theory anyway, are more considerate. Give you the space you need. Nolee used to say it was like parting the red sea.”

“It makes you vulnerable. People think you can't defend yourself.”

“I think you’re more vulnerable without it. You have to ask yourself, which is more vulnerable Doctor? Using the cane or lying on the ground because you didn’t know there was a kerb or a tree root or a pylon or a person or literally anything! Besides, anyone who knows you knows you can defend yourself and anyone who doesn’t learns very quickly.”

“Did anyone ever tell you you’re like a bloody dog with a bone Yaz?” the Doctor scowled.

“Did anyone ever tell you that if the wind changes your face will stick like that?” Yaz quipped.

The Doctor couldn’t help herself, she actually smiled.

Yaz took it as a minor victory, she would take what she could get.

“I assume you still have… it?

“It?”

“You know what I mean.”

“Then say it.”

Yaz could see her visibly wrestling with herself.

“The damn cane Yaz. Do you have it.”

“Hand.” The Doctor held out her hand and Yaz pressed the cane into it.

It felt lighter than she was expecting and cool to the touch. There was a rubber bit, a string, a pointed end and it was all held together in a bundle with a cord. She was struggling to picture in her mind what she was holding, she couldn’t think of a time when she had ever seen one particularly up close before.

“Want me to tell you about it?” Yaz offered.

The Doctor nodded, eliciting a small sigh.

Yaz took her hand again and guided it over the parts she was talking about. “It’s the right length so when you stand it should come up to your arm pit, but you walk fast so you might need a slightly longer one in future. It’s made of reflective white fibreglass with an elastic cord running up the centre so it can be folded up easily. The handle is made of black rubber and there is a cord attached. You get different tips, this one is a pointer tip but if you don’t like it we can try different ones.”

“I thought they were red and white” the Doctor murmured.

“Red and white is for someone who is Deaf and blind.”

Yaz could see her stifle a shudder at the thought. And the realisation of just how much worse things could be for her.

They sat in silence for a minute.

“How does it work?” the Doctor asked finally.

Yaz put a hand under the Doctor’s elbow and guided her to her feet.

“The basics are pretty simple. You’re right-handed yeah?”

The Doctor nodded in confirmation.

“Then ideally you want to hold the cane in your left hand so that your dominant hand is free for other things like reading braille signs, trailing a wall or walking with a guide. But if you can't get used to it in your left hand you can try your right. Put your hand out like you’re going to shake… that’s it. Now take the cane like that and extend your pointer finger down the grip. When you walk, you’re going to sweep it in an arc from side to side that’s a little wider than your body. It should tap on the floor at the end of each arc. When you step with your left foot, the cane should be on your right side and vice versa, you with me?”

The Doctor nodded nervously and swallowed.

“There’s still nothing in this corridor Doctor, why don’t you give it a go? It’s long and straight. And even if it all goes pear shaped, I won’t let you fall, promise.”

The Doctor froze. She strained for some sort of clue as to where she was in the TARDIS – a sound, a smell… but there was nothing.

“Doctor?” Yaz prompted.

The Doctor jumped.

Yaz gently took her arm and guided her so she was parallel with the wall.

“Reach out your right hand Doctor.”

The Doctor reached out a shanking hand until it made contact with the wall.

“Every time you sweep with your cane you want it to make contact with the wall, that way you will know if you stray off course.”

Yaz did her best to remain patient as she took the Doctor through the very basics of how to use her white cane. They practiced walking up and down the blank corridor and eventually the TARDIS allowed the door to her bedroom to reappear and she was able to practice using it to actually go somewhere, the room was large with enough furniture where she had to use it to navigate but not so much that she wasn’t able to actually use the cane. Yaz decided they could leave more complex tasks such as stairs, uneven surfaces and unfamiliar environments for another night.

Finally though, Yaz had to call it a night. The Doctor’s anxiety had increased, and she was becoming more irritable as a result. And besides, she had an early shift.

“Can I guide you somewhere before I go?” Yaz offered.

“I don’t need a babysitter.” The Doctor scowled, crossing her arms. But, to Yaz’s pleasure, she kept hold of the cane tightly.

“I know you don’t. But I think the TARDIS might be a little more accommodating if I’m taking you.”

There was a soft hum and Yaz got the impression that the TARDIS was agreeing with her.

“You’re supposed to be on my side.” The Doctor muttered, annoyed.

“I am on your side.” Yaz protested.

“I was talking to the TARDIS.”

“Console room?” Yaz offered.

“Fine.”

The Doctor once again took Yaz’s arm and allowed herself to be guided back to the console room and Yaz placed her hand on the central console so she could orient herself to the room and would know where she was. It didn’t escape Yaz’s notice that the TARDIS had already cleaned up the debris from earlier.

“Maybe go light on the maintenance while I’m away yeah?” Yaz joked.

The Doctor glowered and made no comment.

“I’ll see you tomorrow Doctor. I’m on an early shift tomorrow, I’ll come by after work?”

“Whatever Yaz. Not like I’ll be seeing anyone anyway.”

She turned her head away and Yaz knew she was trying to hide her emotions though she wasn’t being very successful.

“Goodnight Doctor.” Yaz reached out and gently put her hand on the Doctor’s shoulder. She stiffened under the touch and Yaz fought the urge to wrap her in a hug.

“Khan!”

“Yes Sergeant Sunder.” Yaz stood up respectfully.

“Bit of an unusual situation Yaz. There’s been a string of murders across the city and the higherups are a bit flummoxed. They’ve asked for a few uniforms to help with the donkey work so to speak so you’re being reassigned temporarily.”

Yaz struggled to keep the glee off her face. A string of murders was terrible. But the chance to be noticed by the detectives, to assist in the case… it was a fantastic opportunity even if all she did was make phone calls and take statements.

“You’ll be reporting to Detective Camilla Davidson, she’s lead on this and Detective Henry Parker. Off you go then.”

Yaz smoothed her uniform and quickly turned around, hurrying upstairs to where the detectives worked, trying to contain her excitement.

“Are you Khan?” asked a beanpole of a man dressed in a black suit and with iron grey, tightly curled hair.

“Yes sir.”

“Good. With me, I’ll catch you up on the way.”

Yaz felt very small as she struggled to match pace with the detective who seemed to be a good two feet taller.

“Davidson and I have worked together a long time Khan. This is a team effort. You might be the small fish, but we still want to hear your thoughts and insights. Understand?”

“Yes sir.”

“Good. What did your sergeant tell you?”

“Just that there’s a string of murders and they’re a bit… strange?”

“That’s putting it mildly. Five deaths so far, victims are different ages, different ethnicities, different genders, different religions, different sexualities…”

“Then how do we know they’re connected sir?”

“Good question Khan. The cause of death.”

“Which is?”

“We don’t know.”

“You don’t know?”

“We know the results. Each victim when we open them up, it’s like their insides have been completely scrambled. Like someone took a big spoon and stirred them up.”

Yaz wrinkled her nose.

Detective Parker led her into the case room and she walked over to look at the pictures displayed on the board. But what caught her eye wasn’t the photos of the victims, each of whom was flat on their back. It was the photo taken after the victim had been removed. Huge scorch marks where the torso had been and yet the victims had appeared intact.

“What kind of weapon could do that sir?”

“That’s the think Khan. No weapon on earth that we know of…”


	2. Chapter 2

Yaz had never thought she was going to find working with the Detectives on the force boring and yet… after an entire day where the most she moved was to walk to the vending machine that dispensed coffee just as bad as in her usual break room (so much for the nice filter coffee she’d heard rumours of) and by the time she had finally been dismissed she was stiff and her brain felt like it was in a fog from all the information. Or a complete lack of information. They had five victims with no discernible pattern as to why they had been chosen, no leads on the weapon used and no suspects. One victim had even been found inside a room locked from the inside. It was weird.

One thing Yaz was sure of though… she needed to speak to the Doctor. Now.

Yaz wasn’t procrastinating this time as she speed walked through Sheffield city centre, aiming for the familiar blue of the TARDIS parked outside her own flat.

“Doctor?” Yaz called, bursting in through the doors of the TARDIS. “DOCTOR?”

Once again the Doctor wasn’t in the console room but Yaz wasted no time, heading straight for the corridors, trusting that the TARDIS would show her where she needed to bed.

The TARDIS was clearly in a good mood because no sooner had Yaz stepped into the corridor than she came across the hall that led directly to the kitchen. She hurried down it and let herself into the kitchen. She didn’t manage to hide her smirk as she took in the scene – the Doctor was sitting at the kitchen table with a mug of tea and packet of custard creams, there was no mess in her wake and the white cane was on the table next to her. Then Yaz remembered the Doctor couldn’t see her smirk anyway and her guts twisted uncomfortably again.

“Hi” Yaz greeted quietly, not wanting to startle her.

“I made you tea, it’s by the kettle.”

“Thanks.” Yaz said, surprised by the uncharacteristically thoughtful gesture. Or rather the very much in character thoughtful gesture, the Doctor always used to have a cup of tea waiting for Yaz after a long shift but the past few weeks she had been too busy being angry and feeling sorry for herself.

She slipped into the seat opposite the Doctor.

“How’s your day been?”

“Oh fantastic. Really exciting Yaz. Saw a few planets, saved an alien race from extinction, escaped from an unbreakable trap… oh wait no I didn’t because _somebody_ won’t take off.”

The TARDIS chimed above her and the Doctor glowered at her.

“Yeah whatever” she muttered. Yaz knew it wasn’t directed at her.

“Anyway…” Yaz said, trying to distract the Doctor from her argument with her ship. “I want to talk to you about something.”

“What?” the Doctor asked warily, fully expecting Yaz to want her to practice braille again or use the cane more. She’d actually been using it all day but she wasn’t going to admit that.

“This thing at work. There’s this big case and it’s weird.”

“What’s the case?”

“Murder inquiry. Five murders actually. The Detectives are pretty sure that they’re connected by the cause of death but they don’t even know what the cause is and they can't find any link between the victims. It appears totally random.”

“Yaz slow down. Why are you telling me this?” the Doctor asked impatiently.

“Well I thought you’d be pleased for me, it’s my first time working on a big case.”

“Sorry Yaz, I am really.”

“It’s fine… it’s just something one of the Detectives said. He said the victims, what was done to them, that he didn’t think it was like any weapon on earth. Those were his exact words and it got me thinking…”

“That the weapon might not be from earth?” the Doctor finished for her.

“Exactly… do you think I'm looking too much into it?”

“Not necessarily. Alien stuff ends up here all the time but by the time it arrives it’s usually broken or else people simply don’t know what it is.”

“So what should I do?”

“Your job. You have no proof about any kind of alien involvement and if you start shouting about it at work you’ll be asked to take a holiday.”

“And what if the evidence starts to show that there is alien involvement?”

“Then you talk to your superiors I suppose. Don’t know why you’re asking me about this Yaz. You know I'm not into the whole chain of command thing.”

“Funnily enough Doctor I’m talking to you because you’re the foremost expert on aliens on this planet right now I assume…”

“You hope” the Doctor interjected darkly.

“And you’re supposed to be my friend.” Yaz continued as if she hadn’t been interrupted.

“Sorry.”

At least she had the grace to look a little abashed this time.

“Yaz you do know the chance of there being alien involvement in this is slim, don’t you?”

“Yeah I do. But it’s still a weird case.”

“It’s your first big one. There’s bound to be loads of stuff to get used to.”

“Yeah I know.”

“Don’t go looking for aliens round every corner Yaz. You might not like what you find.”

“Well that’s not comforting in any way.” Yaz muttered. “Anyway, thanks for the tea Doctor but I actually can't stay tonight.”

“Oh… that’s okay Yaz. See you some other time?”

If Yaz wasn’t very much mistaken, the Doctor actually looked… disappointed.

“You can come with me if you like.” Yaz offered, wondering if she would live to regret the offer.

“That’s okay Yaz. Wouldn’t want to interrupt family time.”

“You’re not interrupting family time, it’s only going to be me there.”

“I’ve got loads to be getting on with.”

“No you don’t Doctor. Come with me. Mum and Dad are working and Sonya’s out with her mates. We’re dog sitting for my aunt and I need to walk him which is why I need to go home but it’s just going to be me tonight. We could watch a movie in our PJs and order a pizza?”

“I don’t…” the Doctor protested.

“I’ll guide you.” Yaz said softly. “And I think you’d love my aunt’s dog, she’s gorgeous.”

“I’m not…”

“Come on Doctor, let’s go. We haven’t had a girls night just the two of us for ages!” Yaz encouraged.

She could see the Doctor was wavering.

Yaz got up and offered the Doctor her arm.

“Come on, pizzas on me. Besides, it’ll give you the chance to use your cane outside seeing as you’ve been practicing with it.”

“How…”

“You left it on the console last night. Now it’s beside you on the table.”

The Doctor finally gave in and stood up. She picked up her cane and shook it out. Yaz was impressed that she tapped it twice against the floor to make sure the components had clicked into place properly.

“Your blue pyjamas are still at mine from the last time we did this. Are they okay or do you want a different pair?”

“No those are fine.” The Doctor said quietly.

She had an uncomfortably tight grip on Yaz’s arm as Yaz guided her out of the TARDIS, the first time she had left since they had arrived back on earth three weeks previously. Rather than stressing the Doctor out with the stairs Yaz took the lift and quickly walked to the flat.

“Just to warn you, my aunts’ dog is very friendly. He’s only small but he will jump up on you, sniff you and generally get under your feet. He’s pretty annoying actually but also stupidly cute. And you don’t need to worry, we won’t be walking anywhere fast, he pees at every hole in the hedge.”

The Doctor could hear him scrabbling at the door excitedly.

Yaz unlocked the door and instantly she could feel the dog, winding it’s way excitedly around her ankles, jumping on her, his little paws scratching just underneath her hip and she could hear his excited barks.

“Flick! Stop!” Yaz scolded but she was laughing.

The Doctor froze, worried about either stepping on him or tripping over him.

“Hang on… okay you can move now, I’ve picked him up. You won’t trip over him. I’ve got his lead but you might need to help me get it on him, he gets so overexcited it’s usually a two person job.”

They walked into the flat together and Yaz directed the Doctor to sit on the sofa before pressing the wriggling ball of fluff into her arms. She guided her hand to the collar.

“Hold him tight, I’m going to try and get his harness on.”

The dog was certainly hyperactive, a trait which the Doctor shared, but she was pretty sure she had never kicked up such a fuss about anything as the dog was making about wearing the harness. Well… maybe she had. But she certainly didn’t lick people while she was kicking up a fuss. Inanimate objects perhaps but she tended to draw the line at licking other life forms. Usually.

“He doesn’t bite does he?” the Doctor asked suddenly as Yaz finally managed to fasten the harness and clip on the lead.

“Nah, you’re safe. Ready?”

Within a few minutes, Yaz and the Doctor had made it outside and were headed to a local park. They made a wide group but as Yaz remembered with Nolee, the Doctor’s white cane parted the red sea as she nervously swung it in front of her with her left hand, her right holding Yaz’s arm and Yaz’s other hand holding tightly to Flick’s lead as she alternated between pulling Flick forward when she got distracted by something and pulling her back when she tried to pull them on to the next exciting scent.

“You okay Doctor?” Yaz asked. Her friends jaw was clenched tight, her grip on Yaz’s arm was bordering on painful and her entire body was stiff.

“I’m fine.”

Neither her words nor her tone of voice did anything to persuade Yaz of that.

“It’s okay if you’re not you know.”

“I said I’m fine Yaz.”

“I heard you. But you’re not as good at hiding your feelings as you like to think you are.”

“There’s just… a lot going on.” She muttered eventually, gesturing round her. “A lot of sounds and smells and it’s like I’m hyper aware of the ground under my feet… it’s...” She trailed off.

“Disorientating?” Yaz offered.

“Something like that.”

They had just stepped through the gates of the park and Yaz steered them off to one side.

“We’re in Weston Park, just outside the city centre. Have you been here before?”

The Doctor shook her head.

“Okay, so we’re somewhere you’ve never been here before. Tell me what you know about it.”

“I don’t know anything about it Yaz. I've never been here before.” She said, frustrated.

“You do know about it. What do your senses tell you?”

“I’m not a child Yaz. I don’t need to play this game.”

“Humour me.”

The Doctor huffed, annoyed, and closed her eyes though she didn’t release her death grip on Yaz’s arm.

“The paths are smooth – not brick, cobbles or gravel. Maybe tarmac? But now we’re on grass.” She bounced a little. “It’s springy and maybe needs cut? But it’s not as long as the grass on Troome. I can hear… water. A pond or a river? And maybe some ducks? I think it’s that way.” She pointed to her right. “There are people talking but I don’t think the park is that busy though I can hear children… are there swings that way?” she asked pointing straight ahead but she didn’t pause for an answer. “I can smell… roses possibly, some sort of perfumed flower. And someone is barbecuing. And… she wrinkled her nose. Are we beside the public toilet block?”

Yaz laughed. “Yeah, just on your left… your other senses tell you a lot more than you think they do Doctor if you can learn to listen to them. But people tend to be so reliant on their sight they miss what their other senses are saying… Can you manage to walk through the park for ten minutes or do you need to go back?”

The Doctor considered. She desperately wanted to be back in the TARDIS where it was familiar and she felt… if not safe, at least less unsafe. But on the other hand she hadn’t been out of the TARDIS for just over three weeks, twenty-two days to be precise and it was nice to have the fresh air on her face again.

“No…” she said slowly. “I'm okay.”

Yaz smiled but didn’t comment. It felt like a victory in her quest to get the Doctor out of her self-imposed isolation. No matter how irritable she was, she needed her friends.

“Flick behave!.. “Sorry Doctor, he’s not normally so over excited.” Yaz complained, pulling the overly enthusiastic dog away from a nervous looking child.

As they neared the pond, Flick started pulling excitedly on the lead as he caught the scent of ducks causing Yaz and by extension the Doctor to lurch forward unexpectedly, sending the Doctor crashing into a bench.

“I’m so sorry!” Yaz gasped, grabbing the Doctor’s arm and helping her upright. “Are you okay?”

“Fine.” The Doctor said through gritted teeth as she braced herself against the back of the bench

“He’s normally so good, don’t know what’s got into him…” T

he little dog was now pawing at both of them, anxious to be on the move again and Yaz yanked him back impatiently.

“Are you hurt?”

“Don’t fuss Yaz. I’m fine.”

But she was breathing heavily, her hands were shaking and she looked anything but fine.

“Come on, we can head back.”

The Doctor accepted Yaz’s arm but by the time they made it back to the flats, Yaz could tell she was struggling to cope and Yaz guided her upstairs and onto the sofa as quickly as she could and pressed a cup of tea into her hands. Yaz couldn’t help but notice how her hands were shaking more than ever as she struggled to hold the cup. She couldn’t help but think of the Doctor self-medicating with ginger on Troome… was it possible she was taking it again? Or something else?

It was so different spending time with her like this, with nothing to do. She had visited Yaz loads of times and yet every time she had found something to ‘fix’ or ‘improve’ or generally be hyperactive and both annoying and endearing at the same time as she ate Hakim’s pakora. Now the silence almost felt awkward.

“Shall we order pizza?” Yaz suggested, anxious to fill the quiet that was only broken by Flick who was snoring lightly from her spot on the sofa.

“Your house Yaz.”

“I’m just going to get my laptop. The coffee table is a foot in front of you if you want to put your cane down.”

Yaz brushed past the Doctor on her way to the bedroom and reappeared a few minutes later, placing the laptop on the table.

“Any requests?”

The Doctor shrugged.

“Half cheese, half veggie okay? With a side of garlic bread?” It was their usual order.

“Doesn’t matter.”

Yaz stopped what she was doing for a moment and looked over at the Doctor. She still had her cane in her hand and was fidgeting with it anxiously. She was still perched on the edge of the sofa, her body tense and rigid… she looked so far away and so incredibly lost.

“Doctor, do you need anything?”

The Doctor jumped a little.

“I’m fine.”

“I know you’ve been here before, but I could show you around again if you like?” Yaz offered.

“It’s quite alright Yaz.”

Her dismissive, forced casual attitude was grating on Yaz and jarring against what her body language was screaming about. Yaz forced herself to remember that the whole situation was still incredibly new to the Doctor, even if she had been blind before. At least when they had been on Troome she had had something to focus on as she had attempted to keep them all safe from the creepy alien snake thing that had been stalking them. Now all she seemed to have to focus on was how she couldn’t see and how terrifying the whole prospect of the unknown was. If only there was some way to distract her…

“Right, this is supposed to be girl’s night, that means pizza, pyjamas and snacks.” Yaz said brightly, trying to be positive. “Pizza is sorted, let’s get our pyjamas, yours are still in my room.”

The Doctor seemed happy enough to go through the motions with Yaz, or at least didn’t seem to have the energy to protest and she changed without complaining and put on a spare pair of Yaz’s slippers before following Yaz back out to the living room though she didn’t look any more relaxed as she sat back on the sofa.

Yaz was just debating what might lift her spirits a little when she was mercifully saved by the doorbell signalling the arrival of the food.

“Pizza!” Yaz cheered, wincing slightly at her own over enthusiasm as she put it on the coffee table.

Yaz took the Doctor’s hand and guided it to the pizza box and pointed out which half was veggie and which was cheese as well as where the napkins and drinks were.

Yaz knew she’d made the right choice of food when the Doctor, after a reluctant start as she fumbled to lift a slice of pizza, shoved it eagerly into her mouth and chewed happily. Yaz had considered Chinese food but she was pretty sure the Doctor hadn’t attempted anything involving cutlery yet and when she was already so on edge probably wasn’t the best time. To ease the tension a little more, Yaz flicked on the television, happy when she came across Legally Blonde on Netflix. They had watched it together at least three times so even though she wouldn’t be able to see it, hopefully she would keep up.

“Do you want the audio narration on?” Yaz offered.

“The what?”

“It’s when someone describes what’s happening on screen.”

“Isn’t that annoying?”

“Eh. Some people like it, some people don’t. If you want it, it won’t bother me at all.”

“I… no it’s fine Yaz.” The Doctor said. Her voice was low and husky and it didn’t suit her. The brief show of enthusiasm she had shown for the pizza had quickly waned and she had gone back to staring at nothing.

The uncomfortable silence fell again.

“Yaz you’re staring at me again. Just spit it out.” Her tone had changed back to sharp and irritated.

Fine. If that’s how she wanted to play it…

“Doctor, the ginger you were taking on Troome… how long had you been taking it?”

“Does it matter? I gave my supply to Graham.”

“Have you been drinking the entire time you’ve known us?”

The Doctor swallowed. Was that really what they thought of her? That she was some sort of addict? She forced herself not to lose her temper, the accusation had stung, mostly because it was true. Well, she probably wouldn’t be classed as an addict but using it as an unhealthy crutch? Most definitely.

“No.” she said finally, not trusting herself say anymore. “And I told you. I wasn’t drinking.”

“Have you had any since we got back to earth?”

“I told you the TARDIS would be on your side. She wouldn’t give me any. And before you ask, no I haven’t gone looking.”

“And… is there anything else that might cause similar effects for you? I'm not judging you or anything…”

“Is that seriously what you think of me Yaz? That I’m some kind of addict who just cares about their next fix?” Her voice was low and dangerous.

“No of course not Doctor, I just… worry about you.”

“Well stop.”

“You didn’t answer my question.” Yaz pushed.

“No I haven’t had any ginger. Yes there are other things that would make me experience a buzz you might refer to as being ‘high’. No I haven’t taken any of them either.” She snapped.

Yaz scrutinised her for a second and in that moment decided to take her at her word.

“If you need help or to talk to…”

“I’m fine Yaz.” She stood up abruptly. “I'm going back to the TARDIS.”

“In your pyjamas?”

“It’s dark out.”

Yaz cleared her throat uncomfortably. “No, it isn’t actually.”

“For fucks sake Yaz, the TARDIS is right outside, does it matter?”

Yaz sighed. “No… I’ll walk back with you.” She sensed there was little point in arguing and offered the Doctor her arm to guide her home. The Doctor ignored the soft nudge from Yaz and shook her cane out instead.

“I don’t need a babysitter.” She hissed acidly. “Especially from someone who’s going to sit and tell me I'm an addict and is probably about to start telling me about local AA meetings or something.”

Yaz took a step back. That had hurt. And she had been about to do no such thing.

The Doctor took a step forward and promptly walked into Yaz.

“Move out of the way Yaz. I don’t need you to take me home.”

“Oh yeah? Where’s the front door?” Yaz challenged.

If looks could kill Yaz would have died right then and there with the one the Doctor gave her, but she didn’t and instead, after a pause that felt more like a stand off, the Doctor grabbed her arm, a little too roughly for Yaz’s liking and pushed her forwards. To be fair, had she known where the front door was it wasn’t like she could get lost on the straight landing leading to the lifts though she could very easily miss the TARDIS once she made it outside.

_Well done Yaz. Handled that one well didn’t you?_

Yaz didn’t invite herself in for which the Doctor was grateful. She just placed the Doctor’ hand on the blue door and walked away with scarcely a good night and the Doctor stumbled inside, sinking down to the floor with her knees tucked in tightly and shaking slightly. She allowed the familiar, calming sounds of the TARDIS to wash over her and soothe her frayed nerves like a healing balm.

The TARDIS didn’t give her peace for long though.

“She was ride to me first… I know I need to apologise… you’re supposed to be on my side… oh shut up.” The Doctor argued with her ship.

The Doctor stuck her hands over her ears, wishing that that would block the TARDIS out of her head for a while but of course, nothing so simple could block the telepathic bond she had with her ship. Instead, she rested her head against the pillar, still curled up tightly, and tried not to cry. She had just been awful to Yaz again. Yaz who was only trying to look out for her, even if she did have an annoying tendency to hover.

_Yaz doesn’t have endless patience. She’s worried about you. Keep treating her like this and she’ll stop coming._

“Shut up and leave me alone.” The Doctor begged.

She really didn’t need the TARDIS chiming in every two minutes telling her what she already to know.

“Khan, with me. We’ve got another body.” Said a grim-faced Detective Parker.

Yaz got up and followed him out. She was tired, she’d been on shift since six that morning, it was coming up to hour twelve and she just wanted to go home. She hadn’t been sleeping that well since her argument with the Doctor two days previously. She had texted a couple of times but they had gone unanswered and Ryan had called into the TARDIS the evening before, reporting that the Doctor had been bumbling around like a bear with a sore head, which she probably had seeing as she had apparently had a fresh bruise on her cheek and there had been no sign of the cane. She had kicked him out after just half an hour.

Detective Parker drove out to the crime scene quickly.

“Have you seen a body before Khan?” he asked, sounding genuinely concerned about her wellbeing.

“Yes sir.”

“I know on TV they always make fun of the rookie for throwing up at the crime scene. Don’t think that’s going to happen here. Death is never pretty and the minute you become desensitised to it is the minute you need to get yourself out. If you need to take a break, take one… and if you’re going to throw up try not to do it on the crime scene itself.”

Parker and Yaz were ushered under the police tape where Detective Davidson was waiting for them along with another few officers Yaz recognised from the station though she wasn’t sure of their names.

The scene was… Yaz didn’t know how to describe it. She had seen bodies before on her travels with the Doctor, including murder victims – Willa’s granny, Prem, Anna, Benny – but this felt different somehow.

The victim was a woman, young, barely older than a teenager. She was lying flat on her back, apparently unscathed but there was a look of terror on her face that was impossible to miss. There was a hint of static in the air but other than that, the deserted alley she had been found in was cold and lonely and completely unremarkable. What an awful place to die.

“Are there more of the burn marks under her body sir?”

“Good question Yaz. Yes there are, exactly the same as before.”

“She looks so afraid… what’s her name?”

“Ellen Parks. Nineteen years old, we think she was walking home from a music lesson or performance of some kind, there was a violin case next to her. Camilla’s going to go and notify her parents now… things just aren’t adding up Khan and this is the second victim in two days. Whoever this is, they’re speeding up. There’s less and less time between each attack and it’s like no one is safe. We need to warn the public to be vigilant but what the hell do we say? We know nothing about who this might be or even really what they’re doing to her. It’s all so… unexplainable.”

“Sir” said Yaz tentatively. “I know someone. She’s a bit… eccentric… but she’s dedicated her life to dealing with and explaining the unexplainable. I think she could help us. This sort of thing is just what she does… She’s a Doctor but she’s one of those people who knows something about everything.”

“Hell, I’ll try anyone at this point. Bring her in Khan, we need all the help we can get with this one.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Apologies if you subscribed and this is your second email, it wasn't displaying properly so I had to take it down and repost. Oops!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you're enjoying this I would love for you to take the time to leave me a comment with any thoughts/suggestions/ideas. It takes a lot of effort to write and it's incredibly disheartening to not get much feedback. It makes me feel like giving up and not continuing.
> 
> This is the last of the 'introductory' chapters, after this, things are going to start heating up pretty fast!

Najia Khan was washing dishes when a very tentative knock came to the door. In fact it was so quiet she thought she was imagining it at first. She dried her hands on the tea towel and went to answer the door, fully expecting the postman or their elderly neighbour who sometimes borrowed a little milk. She was therefore very surprised when she opened the door to find the Doctor standing there. 

Najia took a moment to reign in her shock at how the Doctor's appearance had changed. She hadn't seen her for weeks and in the intervening time it was like she had aged several years. Her skin was pale and grey like she had been lacking in sunlight. She had definitely lost weight and there was a bruise on her forehead, marring the otherwise pale skin. It was her eyes though... they had been so sparkly and full of life. Now... they were dull and shrouded - the sight loss was definitely obvious. She was dressed as she always was but the addition of the white cane in her hands, held diagonally across her body with shaking hands was jarring. Yaz had told her of course, that the Doctor had lost her sight in an accident but the reality of it... 

"Hello?" the Doctor asked. She sounded frustrated, clearly Najia had hesitated just a moment too long.

"Hi."

"Sonya?"

"Actually it's Najia."

The Doctor blushed, embarrassed at her mistake. 

"Yaz isn't here."

"Oh... sorry."

She looked confused about what she was supposed to do now and Najia took pity on her.

"She's at work but we're expecting her soon. Do you want to come in and wait for her?"

"I..." she didn't look sure. 

You can't stand outside in the corridor until Yaz comes home. What if she's later? Come inside."

The Doctor gulped anxiously. She had been in the Khan flat since she had lost her sight, just a few days ago actually, when she and Yaz had had a fight and she was supposed to be here to apologise and then leave. Najia there was an added complication. She didn't really want someone, least of all Yaz's mum judging her as she got lost trying to find the sofa. Yaz was bad enough and she was nothing if not patient and understanding. It was annoying.

"Well come on then." Najia encouraged brusquely. She was aware of the disagreement between her daughter and the Doctor, Yaz hadn't wanted to talk about it but she had come back from wherever the Doctor lived the day before in tears. Yaz had never said as much but the one outfit and random disappearances, Najia suspected that the Doctor was homeless.

The Doctor took a very tentative step and then fumbled, trying to find where exactly the door frame was. 

Najia watched for a moment, unsure of what to do for the best. She had always seemed so supremely full of confidence, almost to the point of arrogance but clearly losing her sight so suddenly had completely knocked her. Well that wasn't surprising, it would knock anybody.

"Should I... Can I help?" she asked awkwardly, remembering how Yaz had sometimes guided her friend Nolee when they were teenagers. 

"Thanks." the Doctor muttered, not sounding particularly grateful and holding out her hand. Najia took it hesitantly, not missing how the other woman jumped slightly at the contact, and awkwardly pulled her into the flat.

The flat was small without a lot of room to manoeuvre and Najia pulled her down the hall, abruptly dropping the Doctor's hand in the kitchen, relieved that if nothing else she hadn't walked her into a wall. 

"The table's in front of you, have a seat." Najia invited, turning away to turn the kettle on. 

The Doctor froze... in front could be anywhere. She could reach out and touch it or it could be in front of her on the far side of the room. She stuck her cane out in front of her and swept it from side to side experimentally, hoping to hit the table or a chair with it but she didn't. She tentatively took a step forward and then another... she wasn't sure what Najia was doing... was she staring? Was she even still in the room? She couldn't be sure. Finally on the fourth step the Doctor's cane hit something with a light, metallic ring. She took another step forward and reached her hand out, relieved when after a little fumbling she located the table. She ran her hands along the side until she found a chair which she pulled out and sat on. 

"Tea" Najia announced from behind her. 

The Doctor startled slightly, she hadn't heard Najia coming, and there was a soft noise as Najia put something on the table. It didn't sound like a cup and, unsure of what else might be on the table the Doctor kept her hands in her lap lest she accidentally knock something to the ground. She fiddled anxiously with the cane in her hands, looping the strap around and around her fingers, unsure of what, if anything, she was supposed to say. 

"How long will Yaz be?" the Doctor asked, uncomfortable with the silence. 

There was no answer, Najia must have left the room. 

What was she supposed to do? Najia must be wearing slippers or something, they were very hard to hear and she listened carefully for any hint of where Najia might be or indeed, if anyone else was home. She couldn't hear Najia but the fridge hummed irritatingly in the background, there was a tap dripping, possibly from the bathroom and next door's TV was creating a soft background noise to everything. It was unsettling and she felt sick. She couldn't remember the layout of the Khan's flat particularly clearly and she felt unable to picture it in her mind. She unexpectedly felt very dizzy and disoriented and she grabbed the edge of the table to remind herself that the world hadn't fallen out from under her. 

Suddenly the front door opened and Yaz arrived home noisily, calling out to Najia cheerfully. There was some thudding coming from the hallway, possibly from Yaz taking off her shoes and stab proof vest though it could just as easily have been something else.

“Doctor!” Yaz sounded very surprised to see her. “What are you doing here?”

Well at least she didn’t sound angry. Though it could be hard to tell when you couldn’t see someone’s face. Actually, this body hadn’t been all that great at it even when it could see.

“I came to see… I came to talk to you.”

“Oh. I was actually going to come and see you after dinner… are you staying?”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea” the Doctor said quietly.

“Why, have you got other plans?” Yaz asked, fighting to keep the sarcasm out of her voice, knowing full well that she hadn’t.

“No… I just…” she trailed off.

“Good. That’s settled then. It’s just me again tonight by the way. Mum is leaving for the night shift in a few minutes, Dad is at his sisters and Sonya is working and won’t be back for a few hours.”

The Doctor let out a frustrated sigh, unable to think of a valid reason to protest that didn’t make herself sound pathetic. At least if it was only Yaz that wasn’t quite as bad as having the entire Khan family watching her.

“I’m leaving now sweetheart. See you tomorrow afternoon.” Najia announced, bustling back into the kitchen. “Something wrong with that cup of tea Doctor?” she added after she had kissed Yaz.

“Just a little hot.” The Doctor muttered, far too embarrassed to admit that she didn’t know where the cup was and not willing to start exploring the table with her hands with an audience.

“It’s about eight inches away at your one o’clock.” Yaz prompted her quietly as the front door shut signalling Najia’s departure.

The Doctor acknowledged her with a small nod and she reached out nervously, though it was more easily located than she had expected.

“I need to go and shower and change. I’ll be back in a minute, do you need anything?” Yaz asked. She could still smell the crime scene on her skin and she was desperate to be back in something that smelled like the fabric softener that her mum always used and to be in something more comfortable than her work uniform.

The Doctor shook her head. Yaz could see the light tremor of her hands as she held the mug of tea, the clench of her jaw and the strain written across her face. She longed to just reach out and give her friend the hug she seemed to so desperately need but the Doctor was never one for physical contact, and the fact that she now relied on it definitely didn’t sit well with her. No, Yaz knew it was better to give the other woman her space. It was a rare moment indeed if she let her guard down enough to allow one of her friends to get in close. In fact, in the last two years or so that she had known the Doctor, time was a tricky concept when you were travelling with her, Yaz could count on one hand the Doctor had let any of them close enough to hug or comfort her in any way, no matter how much she may have needed it.

In the shower Yaz took her time, washing her long hair out several times and lathering the soap thickly over her body until all she could smell was the mango of her shower gel and the strawberry of her shampoo. She kept the shower as hot as she could stand and when she finally stepped out, the bathroom was damp all over.

Yaz wrapped herself in a towel and blushed furiously as she realised she had forgotten her towel, leaving it on the bed in her bedroom on the other side of the flat. She looked around the bathroom for inspiration, she really didn’t want to put on her uniform again but the only towel in the bathroom was the small hand towel beside the sink… then she remembered that it didn’t matter. The Doctor wouldn’t be able to see her anyway. She would have no idea unless Yaz told her. The thought didn’t make Yaz feel any better. In fact, it just made her feel sick.

Yaz didn’t want to take advantage of the Doctor’s blindness and she covered herself with her clothes as best as she could without actually putting them on. In her room she towel dried and bushed her hair, leaving it to dry naturally over her shoulders and put on a long sleeved t-shirt, her stripey pyjama bottoms and a pair of slippers. The combination made her feel better and she braced herself, heading out to the main flat to make dinner and talk to the Doctor.

“I’m going to make meatballs, I feel the need for comfort food.” Yaz announced quietly as she headed back into the kitchen.

The Doctor hadn’t moved where Yaz had left her but she didn’t look any more relaxed either.

Yaz had bought the ingredients on the way home. She wasn’t an experienced cook or even particularly interested in cooking and she had bought a jar of sauce and pre-made halal meatballs rather than lots of fresh ingredients… well at least it wasn’t a ready meal.

Yaz attempted to start a conversation a couple of times but while the Doctor didn’t ignore her, her answers were static, effectively halting any conversation in its tracks. She tried not to take it personally, the Doctor was clearly in a bit of a state, the anxiety practically rolling off of her in waves.

“Here. Make yourself useful.” She instructed the Doctor, putting a chopping board in front of her containing a cheese grater and lump of cheese and explaining what she wanted.

“How much should I grate?”

“All of it. I’ve seen you eat cheese and I’d actually like some this time.”

The Doctor hesitantly did as she had been asked and while she was at it Yaz quietly put the packet of spaghetti she had bought back into the cupboard and lifted out a bag of penne pasta instead which would be easier for her to eat.

Ten minutes later Yaz slid a plate of meatballs onto the table in front of the Doctor.

“Plate at your twelve o’clock, cutlery at your eight. You have six meatballs and they’re on top of the pasta. Sauce is already mixed in.” Yaz explained, sitting down next to her.

The Doctor slowly reached out and lifted the cutlery, exploring what she had which was a knife, fork and spoon, but made no attempt to eat.

“I know you haven’t had to try and manage cutlery yet Doctor but I’m not watching you and I’m not going to judge you.” Yaz said softly, correctly interpreting the Doctor’s silence. “And I can give you a tea towel or kitchen roll if you want.”

The Doctor didn’t say anything but Yaz got up and found the kitchen roll, pressing it into the Doctor’s hands anyway and she slowly spread a few pieces across her lap, blushing furiously.

Yaz ate her own meal in silence and when she was finished, she busied herself around the kitchen, not wanting the Doctor to feel watched and judged. She was having great difficulty trying to stab the slippery pieces of pasta though she had managed the meatballs, only losing one to the floor. After another few minutes the Doctor gave up with a frustrated sigh, pushing her plate away from her with less than half of her portion of pasta done but Yaz decided against mentioning it and just scraped it into the bin and put the plate into the dishwasher.

Yaz and the Doctor went through to the living room where the Doctor resumed fidgeting anxiously with her cane.

“What did you want to talk to me about?” Yaz asked when they had sat in an awkward silence for a minute.

“I owe you an apology.” The Doctor said finally. “I was rude to you the other night and I'm sorry.”

“Okay…” Yaz said, surprised.

“That’s all you’re going to say?”

“What do you want me to say?”

“You had plenty to say the other night.”

“I’m sorry I accused you of being an addict. It wasn’t fair of me.”

“You’re right. It wasn’t... But it was a reasonable question under the circumstances.”

“I can't stop worrying about you at the moment Doctor. I know you don’t want to hear it and I know you’re scared and this is really overwhelming but taking it out on me isn’t going to help. You’re a master at pushing away the people who care about you.”

“I know.”

“I’m not the only person who you owe an apology too.”

“I know.”

“Ryan texted me earlier and invited me over for dinner with them tomorrow night. Will you come with me?”

“I'm not invited.”

“Since when did you require an invitation?”

The Doctor opened her mouth to argue and then closed it again, unable to think of one.

“I can't be piggy in the middle here Doctor. Just come with me. I’ll meet you at the TARDIS after work and we can walk over together. You’ll be fine.”

The Doctor sighed and agreed reluctantly. She really did owe Ryan and Graham an apology but going to yet another place she wasn’t particularly familiar with, eating in front of them most likely with cutlery again, using her cane… she hated it. It made her feel so dependent and useless.

“What did you want to talk about?” the Doctor asked Yaz suddenly. “You said you were going to find me later.”

“Oh yeah. It’s about this thing at work…” and Yaz launched into an explanation, explaining the case to the Doctor again, focusing on the weirder aspects that didn’t really make sense.

“So, what do you think?” Yaz asked a few minutes later when she had outlined everything.

“I don’t really know why you’re telling me this Yaz.”

“Because I want your help Doctor. I'm convinced we’re up against something that’s not from earth.”

“You have no evidence of that.”

Yaz snorted. “Since when did you care about evidence? It’s just a feeling Doctor. Don’t sit there and tell me I’m imagining it.”

“I’m not saying you’re imaging it Yaz… just you don’t need to tell me this stuff to try and make me… I don’t know. Happy or something. Whatever it is you’re trying to do. I'm not a charity case you have to look after.”

Yaz groaned. “God you’re so annoying sometimes, do you know that? I don’t think you’re a ‘charity case’ and I’m not your mother. I worry about you because we’re friends and that’s what friends do. Of course I want you to be happy but I'm not sitting around thinking of ways to force you to plaster some sort of fake grin on your face. It’s just… I just can't put my finger on it Doctor. Something doesn’t feel right. I don’t know if it’s like déjá vu or what from something you’ve told me or I’ve seen but as soon as I saw the crime scene photos it was like an alarm going off in my head to get you.”

The Doctor’s face morphed like playdough for a few moments while she clearly tried to figure out where to go next.

“Look Yaz, even if you’re right its not like I can do anything to help right now is it?”

“You’re many things but helpless really isn’t one of them... Besides I already told my boss you would help and now he’s expecting you…” she added sheepishly.

“Well then untell him.” The Doctor demanded.

“I can't. This is my first chance at a big case Doctor. I know you can help. Please, just come with me. The last scene is still sealed. I have permission to take you there tomorrow and then bring you to the station to spitball some ideas.”

“You shouldn’t have done that without asking me!”

“Oh you know what, just forget it Doctor. It doesn’t matter. You know the person I used to know, my friend, she never would have let me down. She would have been out there days ago when I first told her about it. And she never would have told me I was imagining it.”

“I can't see Yaz! What the hell kind of use would I be? You want to take me to see a crime scene! I know nothing about them and even I did I can't fucking see it!”

“Is that going to be your excuse forever now? That you can't see so you’re not doing anything? Cause that’s gonna be a pretty shit way to live your life.”

The Doctor blew out an angry breath. Well at least they weren’t shouting at each other. Every time they saw each other at the moment it seemed to end in a shouting match.

“Fine Yaz if it means that much to you, I’ll go to your damn crime scene. But I can guarantee you that I’ll have nothing to add that you couldn’t have figured out twenty times faster with your perfectly good working eyes.”

Yaz tried very hard to not to let her triumphant grin come through in her voice.

“Thank-you.”


End file.
